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Motherhood

Beyond Amazing: The Excruciatingly Slow Steps of a Mother's Labour of Love

boulders
The journey of a thousand miles may start with a single step, but when you are a mother of small children each of those steps can feel excruciatingly slow. Whether the journey you take is studying, starting a business, building a career, commencing therapy, renovating, or a community project, the process may feel interminable, eternal, never ending.
You finally sign up for the thing, dedicating an hour a day to the cause, and your toddler drops their nap. The routine of da…

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Why do I talk birth when I'm a postpartum doula?

anna
Why do I spend so much time banging on about birth info when I’m actually a postpartum doula? Because, quite simply, we can’t pretend birth doesn’t influence postpartum.
The impact, as any mother or person whose experienced a traumatic or amazing birth will tell you, is massive. As such, preparing for birth is, in a way, preparing for postpartum, but we can’t end our efforts at birth affirmations.
My tips are:
1️⃣Get independent birth AND lactation education. You can’t re…

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3 Years In: What Would I Change?

As my child hurtles towards her third birthday and the end of infancy, I have been reflecting on my parenting and its evolution so far.
What am I satisfied with? A fair bit.
What would I do differently if I had my time over? Some things, for sure.
One thing I would absolutely not change however is supporting my child’s sleep through nurture, night and day. We have been close, responsive and watching her rather than a clock, through the non-linear process that is biologic…

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Again? Birthing Parents Ignored Again While Hillsong Parties Down The Road

I went on my first school camp at Glenrock Scout Camp, aged around 9 or 10 years old. That place has been in the news lately, but it wasn’t a big deal then.
What I remember as a view from a bunk bed, a movie night and a cold lagoon has been used in the last few days for Hillsong’s “Wildlife” event and summer camp. Footage from the event (released by Hillsong Youth in their own social media, not leaked), shows hundreds of people singing and dancing to performers inside a massive tent, …

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Start Early: Why Waiting To Be The "Fun One" Falls Flat

tim chest baby

If you’re tempted to leave the baby duties to your partner and come back for the “fun part” when they’re old enough to play, I have news for you! Unfortunately... it just doesn’t work that way.

Yes, baby care is hard, because all the skills are new and baby communication is a new language.

Think of it this way. You wouldn’t head off to a new country without doing any language training and expect to cruise through. You’d likely do some reading up, and spend a few weeks on a language app so you co…

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Mothers And Birth Parents Are Not Doormats. It's Time We Stopped Trampling Them.

not your passenger
“I’ll schedule your induction for Wednesday”

“I’ll check your cervix now”

“This will make the placenta come faster”

“They’re latching fine, you’ll get used to it”

“It’s policy to place them back in the crib”

“Just let them cry, they’ll soothe themselves”

“Tongue ties aren’t real”

“Start topping up with formula after each feed”

“It’s normal to feel low/anxious/exhausted”

“You should be grateful you had any leave at all”

“Mayb…

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Losing The Plot? Unfortunately, It's On Us.

interrupted
In the process of eating this bowl of pasta, I was interrupted to read to a toddler on the potty and wipe them.
I took the potty outside to rinse it and shut the barking dog up, because even though there was a full bucket of water right next to it, they wanted to drink from the empty one.

On my way past the laundry I put the wet washing into the basket and carried it to the back step. 
Feeling very organised I re-entered am eerily quiet lounge room to find green crayon be…

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Running Yourself Ragged? Why We Matyr Ourselves Even When We'd Rather Not

matyr

What would you say if I told you that mothers benefit from matyring themselves?

I know it sounds cracked.

Mothers, birth parents and parents socialised as women are absolutely conditioned to give, give, give until there is nothing left - to martyr themselves “for the good of others”.

This isn’t about the excessive load mothers (especially single or solo mothers) must carry in order for their family to be ok, I’m opening a discussion about the reasons behind us “going above and beyond”.

Humans (at le…

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Pandemic Motherhood Getting You Down? It's Not Just You.

Dad worked such long hours
“Dad worked such long hours... how did you do it alone for so long?”

Mum tilted her head and thought a while.

“We had an excursion each day. We did the groceries or met someone at a park, went to playgroup and swimming. And we had excellent neighbours.”

I thought of the weeks and months we’ve spent staying home. The parks we visit early before the crowds. Play dates postponed for the slightest of sniffles. The groceries done by click and collect because babies don’t wear m…

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If you're buying me a Christmas present...

beside table
“What’s on your bedside table?” the interviewer asked me.
I wracked my brains and eventually remembered.
On my table was a book by an author I loved. Despite my good intentions, it had sat unmoved, dust-covered and guilt-inducing for many months.
“Read me,” it had whispered every night. Eventually, when many nights had passed lying beside but not touching, it had fallen silent like a jilted lover and become part of the furniture.
I am in the season of motherhood whe…

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