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Motherhood

"Regretting Motherhood": 6 Key Learning Points for Doulas and Parents

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You know when you think you’re not that hungry, only to start eating and find out you’re ravenous?

This is exactly how it was for me reading Regretting Motherhood by Orna Donath. After many not-that-exciting motherhood related reads in 2023, once I got my teeth into this one I devoured it. I didn’t want it to end, and found myself doing the reading version of “licking the bowl”, i.e. studying the reference list in detail!

If you are a feminist, someone who works with mothers, or a feminist who…

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3 tips to do 70% of your best in 2024

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New Year is often the time people decide they’re going to do more of something, less of another, transform this or ditch that. While I’m not one for resolutions, I can appreciate there are certain times of year when it’s easier to find motivation for healthful behaviours than others. (The rhyme isn’t the only reason Dry July is much more palatable concept for many than Dry December!)

If there are any Default Parents reading this and thinking about setting personal “goals” or “intentions” for 20…

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An angry mother is an underresourced mother

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Thursday night was one of the most relaxed nights I can remember with my kids. I played and bathed with them without having to feign interest. There was no arguing or gritting my teeth despite my unfairly low-sleep-needs firstborn not being interested in sleep until well after 9pm. I was solo parenting but had it covered. I am smashing this mum-of-two thing, I thought as I dozed off alongside both of my sleeping cherubs, I’ve got this in the bag.

The following night, less than 24 hours after pa…

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"Such a good age": Why eight months postpartum can feel like anything but

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EIGHT MONTHS POSTPARTUM.

A time also known as: Oooft, Dear Lordy, WTF, Why? What is sleep? and alternatively, Send help.

By far, no question, without a doubt, 8 months postpartum was the hardest time for me. This is the primary reason why my single session/SOS doula day service extends beyond the newborn period to when baby turns two years old!

I’m not the only one, and I can see why so many hit rock bottom at that age. Here’s what’s going on for many mothers and birth parents in Australia at…

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The Cover Up: When motherhood is not as it seems

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There’s something wrong with this picture.


In the blink of an eye between being a student and a mother, those fleeting moments “disposable income” was a thing, I subscribed to this magazine.


I would receive and read each month, then take to share with colleagues in my workplace lunch room.


Sometimes we’d look at the images and dream of living as the women pictured did - the ones who ran their hands through the tips of grasses and smiling while inspecting fleece - then glance at the cloc…

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Beyond Amazing: The Excruciatingly Slow Steps of a Mother's Labour of Love

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The journey of a thousand miles may start with a single step, but when you are a mother of small children each of those steps can feel excruciatingly slow. Whether the journey you take is studying, starting a business, building a career, commencing therapy, renovating, or a community project, the process may feel interminable, eternal, never ending.
You finally sign up for the thing, dedicating an hour a day to the cause, and your toddler drops their nap. The routine of da…

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Why do I talk birth when I'm a postpartum doula?

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Why do I spend so much time banging on about birth info when I’m actually a postpartum doula? Because, quite simply, we can’t pretend birth doesn’t influence postpartum.
The impact, as any mother or person whose experienced a traumatic or amazing birth will tell you, is massive. As such, preparing for birth is, in a way, preparing for postpartum, but we can’t end our efforts at birth affirmations.
My tips are:
1️⃣Get independent birth AND lactation education. You can’t re…

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3 Years In: What Would I Change?

As my child hurtles towards her third birthday and the end of infancy, I have been reflecting on my parenting and its evolution so far.
What am I satisfied with? A fair bit.
What would I do differently if I had my time over? Some things, for sure.
One thing I would absolutely not change however is supporting my child’s sleep through nurture, night and day. We have been close, responsive and watching her rather than a clock, through the non-linear process that is biologic…

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Again? Birthing Parents Ignored Again While Hillsong Parties Down The Road

I went on my first school camp at Glenrock Scout Camp, aged around 9 or 10 years old. That place has been in the news lately, but it wasn’t a big deal then.
What I remember as a view from a bunk bed, a movie night and a cold lagoon has been used in the last few days for Hillsong’s “Wildlife” event and summer camp. Footage from the event (released by Hillsong Youth in their own social media, not leaked), shows hundreds of people singing and dancing to performers inside a massive tent, …

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Start Early: Why Waiting To Be The "Fun One" Falls Flat

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If you’re tempted to leave the baby duties to your partner and come back for the “fun part” when they’re old enough to play, I have news for you! Unfortunately... it just doesn’t work that way.

Yes, baby care is hard, because all the skills are new and baby communication is a new language.

Think of it this way. You wouldn’t head off to a new country without doing any language training and expect to cruise through. You’d likely do some reading up, and spend a few weeks on a language app so you co…

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