Post-partum

In one of my favourite books (and less conventional pre-baby maternity leave reads) "The Five Invitations", author Frank Ostaseski invites us to bring our whole selves to the experience of life so we can approach death without fear and regret.

If we strive to the patriarchal, capitalist mantles of womanhood and motherhood as pure selflessness, sacrificing of our own needs to meet the needs of others, we repress our experience of life and risk approaching those breaths unfulfilled.

How would it f…

💔The relationship counsellor who's marriage is falling apart.
💪The personal trainer who never gets time for their own workout.
👇Me.

I write this as a postpartum support professional who tells mums to get all the help they need, yet put it off for myself.

The mama mentor who teaches other mums to look after themselves, but put making an appointment for myself low on my priority list.

The exercise professional who tells women to see a pelvic floor physio six weeks after they birth their baby, yet…

Some bubs LOVE being worn. We're carrying mammals after all.

There are wraps, slings, structured carriers... How to choose?

This is what we know:

Baby wearing helps the infant stay close to the caregiver and regulate its breathing and reduce stress levels (neurodevelopment).

There are myths and truths around baby wearing and baby's hips, and postural considerations for the caregiver (science, anatomy).

The proximity of the baby by touch and scent accelerates bonding between the wearer and the baby (b…

As the woman stands opposite, she breathes. Her shoulders are relaxed, her gaze is reassuring.

Her ears and eyes are open, she sees all of you laid bare, and breathes. She does not shy away or problem solve.

She sees your obstacles through fresh eyes, and breathes love into them, into you.

Through the days, my bright, affectionate, determined child fills the room with her energy.

Yet as I lay chest to chest with her, enveloping her ever-growing frame in the dim morning light, I drink in the baby that only returns when she sleeps.

Many mums experience a glistening high or adrenalin rush the first couple of days post-birth. Sometime around day three to five, they suddenly feel like they've been hit by a steamroller. Tiredness catches up with them and they can feel fragile, teary and a little lost in her new role. Mama's mood slumps, she may be irritable or have difficulty sleeping, and she can start to question herself - am I really cut out for this? Here's what is actually happening behind the scenes hormonally.

During…

It has been suggested that the minimum hands on care that a newborn needs is nine hours per day. Most need far more, fragmented throughout the day and night, particularly if it likes to sleep in your arms, as is preferred by many babies. So how to get through that time without going insane?

So many mamas ask about baby brain.

Maybe you forget your colleague's name.

Or you pack for swimming lessons and arrive with a swim nappy and goggles but no swimmers.

Or you arrive at your appointment on the right day and the right time but on the wrong week.

So is "baby brain" real? Yes.

Is it exaggerated? Often.

So why does it happen? This is why.

Your brain goes through a software upgrade when you're pregnant.

1. Your brain shrinks in specific areas. It deletes some old connections that are unimporta…

I spent hours researching this car seat. Days in fact, maybe even a week or more.

Everything else I picked up from Gumtree or as hand-me-downs without too much planning or expense - bassinet, pram, carriers, clothes, cloth nappies, swaddles, sleeping bags - the list of baby gear could go on forever.

The car seat though, where you're asked to weigh up safety features, ease of use, expense, rear and forward facing capacities, comfort...this felt like a huge responsibility. It was one of the firs…